It's Monday! Let's Eat Babies!

Ok, so one of our regulars is here today....you know....'cause he's a regular.

And like, he's only usually MODERATELY creepy, mainly because of what he looks like. Like he kind of looks like if James Brown and Rick James combined to form Captain SoulWeave. He also sometimes wears hospital scrubs tops with his pants.

I do not think he works in a hospital.

ANYWAY. He usually comes by himself and like sits and reads EVERY PAPER in the building.

Today?

He brought....A BABY.

Yes. A baby. A baby that appears to be covered in ceremonial bells.

Or, maybe that's just a mobile.

I DON'T KNOW.

Baby has not yet made a noise. I think Baby....is for eating.

Look. I'm just saying? Baby in NO WAY belongs to Captain SoulWeave.

I'm keeping vigilant watch.

I did however have to turn away for a moment because a patron asked me how I tied my FASHIONABLE SUMMER SCARF.

Well, let's call it a Fashionable AUTUMN Scarf, seeing as how the seasons have changed, and although it is light-weight, it does contribute some warmth. In fact, it's the time of year for me to look like a consumptive Victorian again. The Library's thermostat is broken, and I will constantly be wearing scarves indoors to protect my delicate nature from TB.

I am not looking to emulate THAT part of Bright Star thanks very much.

Speaking of, go and see that film. Just beautiful....understated, quiet and lovely.

:::weeps::::

That Ben Whishaw? Expect more great things.

I will leave you with the following....

Just now, I have been asked to please monitor some creepy dude in the stacks who is surfing the Free Wireless Wave on his laptop. Apparently, he's been banned from like every other place in [City Where I Work] that offers free wireless for looking at kiddie porn.

So now I have been asked, to go over there periodically to see what he's looking at.

Um.

No? Like I don't want to see PORN. I have already seen enough PORN at the library to last me 3 goddamn lifetimes. Does no one think that mayhap I will be scarred beyond all reason if I have to see this shiz? I am not trained to deal with this kind of crap.

I'm a BOOK PUSHER people.

Oh, SPARE me. That's all I ask. I am at the point where literally, if I have to tell this creeper to please stop looking at HORRIBLE HORRIBLE THINGS I may just lose.my.mind.

I also may not be able to refrain from spitting on him or kicking him in the jaw.

Again.

Not trained to rationally handle such things.

Poor, poor, dead soul.

You were just too high strung.